I hope I become half the woman my Mother is.

She is the most beautiful, smart, kind-hearted person.

I want to be a mother like she is. I want to become the nurse she has become.

I admire her love for children and the sick, and I thank God she passed down her wonderful traits to me.

I ask God everyday why we're dealt the cards we have been given. I still don't understand why a woman like my mother, who worked so hard to get where she is today, has to work 2 jobs as a pediatric nurse practitioner, care for 3 kids in college, and mother a step granddaughter. But no matter what, she always carries everything with love. And she loves us more than anyone could imagine. I dream of the day when we're graduated and she can enjoy time off.

I've learned from her- 

to always smile and be happy, don't let people know you're falling on the inside. And maybe I learned it a little too well, as for I never share my emotions (well maybe to Gracie). 

I've learned from her- 

that children are God's most precious gifts to life and we must love them unconditionally...thus leading to my dream of becoming a pediatric oncology nurse. The reward of seeing a child smile outweighs all negatives.

I've learned from her- 

to enjoy the quiet times, because they so rarely happen (especially in a family with 5 kids, 1 grandchild, and 5 dogs)

I've learned from her-

that we ALL make mistakes, some you would never expect, but that doesn't mean we aren't good people. You live, you learn. And I thank her for letting us "live" and finding life on our own.

But the one thing I'm not sure I will ever learn, is why, if we do good, are we not given good in return? Life is all about numbers and money, and I hate that. I have become a very hard worker just like my mother and I still haven't seen it "pay off" yet. It's almost the harder I push forward, the more of a struggle it is. She tells me that this will all be worth it in the end, and I know it will, because I won't settle for less, but it's hard waiting around for the "worth it" when it seems like it's taking forever. 

Until then I guess I'll keep trucking through and keep smiling (dreaming of the future).

I love you Mama. I am so blessed to have the greatest best friend in the whole world. I guess that's why I'm so picky about friends, because I know there's no one I could trust better, have more fun with, or love more.

xoxo

Peace & Cookies

I've Learned...

I've learned -

that no matter how much I care,
some people just don't care back.

I've learned -
that it takes years to build up trust,
and only seconds to destroy it.

I've learned -
that it's taking me a long time
to become the person I want to be

I've learned -
that you should always leave
loved ones with loving words.
It may be the last time you see them.

I've learned -
that you can keep going
long after you think you can't.

I've learned -
that learning to forgive takes practice.

I've learned -
that there are people who love you dearly,
but just don't know how to show it.

I've learned -
that money is a lousy way of keeping score.

I've learned -
that true friendship continues to grow,
even over the longest distance.
Same goes for true love.

I've learned -
that just because someone doesn't love you
the way you want them to doesn't mean
they don't love you with all they have.

I've learned -
that maturity has more to do with
what types of experiences you've had
and what you've learned from them
and less to do with how many
birthdays you've celebrated.

I've learned -
that your family won't always
be there for you. It may seem funny,
but people you aren't related to
can take care of you and love you
and teach you to trust people again.
Families aren't biological.

I've learned -
that no matter how good a friend is,
they're going to hurt you
every once in a while
and you must forgive them for that.

I've learned -
that it isn't always enough
to be forgiven by others.
Sometimes you have to learn
to forgive yourself.

I've learned -
that our background and circumstances
may have influenced who we are,
but we are responsible for who we become.

I've learned -
that two people can look
at the exact same thing
and see something totally different.

I've learned -
that no matter the consequences,
those who are honest with themselves
get farther in life.

I've learned -
that your life can be changed
in a matter of hours
by people who don't even know you.

I've learned -
that even when you think
you have no more to give,
when a friend cries out to you,
you will find the strength to help.

I've learned -
that credentials on the wall
do not make you a decent human being.

I've learned -
that the people you care most about in life
are taken from you too soon.

I've learned -
that it's hard to determine
where to draw the line
between being nice and
not hurting people's feelings
and standing up for what you believe.

I've learned-

that if you pursue happiness, it will elude you. 

But if you focus on your family, the needs of others, 

your work, meeting new people, 

and doing the very best you can, happiness will find you.

I've learned-

that life sometimes gives you a second chance.

I've learned-

that you shouldn't go through life with a catchers mitt on both hands. 

You need to be able to throw something back.

I've learned-

that I still have a lot to learn